Mysterious Milk of the Mountains

Who doesn't love an invigorating hike to the top of a mountain?  

The American wilderness offers spectacular views, but to really celebrate the climb, there's nothing better than a well-stocked Alpenhüte that offers a hearty meal with a glass of fresh mountain milk.

You've marched over the cow pats along the alpine trails, you've pondered the sure-footedness of these docile beasts in their high-altitude home, now taste nature's goodness in a glass!

Having that pleasure available at your breakfast table must be a modern wonder, don't you think?  But what if you take the time to read the small print…

A symbol of a magnifying glass to help us understand what's in the bottle…Lait de Montagne demi-écrémé stérilisé UHT.  Half-cream mountain milk in sterile UHT packaging.  Good.

The next symbol, a stick figure doing jumping-jacks tells us about the nutritional facts * based on your daily recommended requirements.  For the sell-by date, see your bottle of this 1/2-litre treat.  It's a natural source of calcium.

Looks good, right?

i:  How to use this bottle of mountain milk…After opening, you need to store your milk at an ambiant temperature in the fridge when you're not drinking it.

After opening, store this milk between +4°C and +6°C, and preferably consume within the next 3 days.

There's a recycling symbol, the ID numbers, and an interesting symbol representing the INSTITUT PROFESSIONNEL DU LAIT DE CONSOMMATION, the bar code, and contact information for Service consommateurs: France INTERDIS-Produits Carrefour/TSA 50010 92695 LEVAILLOIS CEDEX, tel. 0 810 06 6000 *charges apply.

So then, what IS mountain milk?  Do you see any indication of life ANYWHERE on the packaging?

What would mislead you to believe that milk comes from cows?

Here's what Carrefour has to say, "... Carrefour, pour bien vendre le produit, nous informe que 25cl du lait carrefour** apporte 1/4 des AJR en sucres simples, 10% en matières grasses, environ 40% en calcium er environ 15% en protéïnes. Donc on peut en conclure que ce lait DE MONTAGNE (parce que des laits de métro existent) ..." and you can read on to find the unsolicited testimonials about how delicious this milk is, with still nary a mention of cows, goats, marmots…

I drink to your health!