In Praise of Corporate Enterprise and its Comic Value

Top 10 Most Brilliant Marketing Screw Ups

1. Coors put its slogan, "Turn it loose," into Spanish, where it was read as "Suffer from diarrhea."

2. Scandinavian vacuum manufacturer Electrolux used the following in an American campaign: "Nothing sucks like an Electrolux."

3. Clairol introduced the "Mist Stick", a curling iron, into German only to find out that "mist" is slang for manure. Not too many people had use for the "manure stick."


4. When Gerber started selling baby food in Africa, they used the same packaging as in the U.S., with the beautiful Caucasian baby on the label. Later they learned that in Africa, companies routinely put pictures on the label of what's inside, since most people can't read.

5. Colgate introduced a toothpaste in France called Cue, the name of a notorious porno magazine.

6. An American T-shirt maker in Miami printed shirts for the Spanish market which promoted the Pope's visit. Instead of "I saw the Pope" (el Papa), the shirts read "I saw the potato" (la papa).

7. Pepsi's "Come alive with the Pepsi Generation" translated into "Pepsi brings your ancestors back from the grave", in Chinese.

8. Frank Perdue's chicken slogan, "it takes a strong man to make a tender chicken" was translated into Spanish as "it takes an aroused man to make a chicken affectionate."

9. The Coca-Cola name in China was first read as "Ke-kou-ke-la", meaning "Bite the wax tadpole" or "female horse stuffed with wax", depending on the dialect. Coke then researched 40,000 characters to find a phonetic equivalent "ko-kou-ko-le",translating into "happiness in the mouth."

10. When Parker Pen marketed a ball-point pen in Mexico, its ads were supposed to have read, "it won't leak in your pocket and embarrass you". Instead, the company thought that the word "embarazar" (to impregnate) meant to embarrass, so the ad read:  "It won't leak in your pocket and make you pregnant."


Following the Exxon/Mobil deal and the AOL/Netscape deal, here are the next Bombshell Mergers that investors could expect:

Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W.R. Grace Company merge to become HALE MARY FULLER GRACE

Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Keebler Crackers merge to become POLLY WARNER CRACKER

3M and Goodyear merge to become MMM GOOD

Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining merge to become ZIP AUDI DO DA.

Federal Express and UPS merge to become FED UP.

Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge and begin manufacturing REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS.

Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will merge and become FAIRWELL HONEYCHILD

Grey Poupon & Dockers Trousers will merge and become  POUPON PANTS

Knott's Berry Farm & National Organization of Women will merge and become KNOTT NOW.


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